When I was younger and singler (I just invented that adjective) I loved trips to Target: cute necklaces, fun snacks, a new wine…the possibilities were endless.
Now, I'm on the hunt for nursery decorations, storage solutions, and clothes for my growing boys. Today, I took my oldest, Fox (for the purposes of this blog), along for the ride.
I've really been loving the new Cat & Jack brand at Target (though sometimes they seem to get on these weird kicks…there's a Wizard of Oz thing happening right now that I'm not sure I'm on board with), so I detoured from my list to check out the kids' clothes. Of course, I found stuff I adored.
This time was different, however.
This time, I actually asked my son's opinion of the outfits I was eyeballing.
"What about this?"
"No, uh uh," he said, coupled with vigorous head shaking. What? Who was this creature with his own opinions?? Suddenly, the voices of some knowing moms came flooding back to me. They'd told me long before I got to this moment that you can't pick what your kids love.
Buy them whatever books, toys, and clothes you like, but ultimately, they will pick a favorite that might surprise, or even defy you.
There's a small part of me (mainly my heart) that breaks a little at the thought of letting go my role as his wardrobe coordinator. I've done such a good job! His fedoras, his cowboy boots, his collared shirts. However, having a child means losing the child you fantasized about and embracing the reality of the pudgy handed, emotionally aware, living, breathing doll-boy in front of you.
I know that his distaste for the adorable pleather jacket with the wool collar is just the beginning of his independence, and as hard as it is to give up that control, it's exciting to see the emergence of the man he will be: fiercely independent, self-assured, and driven.
And somebody, maybe that man will be wearing a fedora; a mom can dream.